I have mountains and mountains of negative thoughts about myself on a daily basis: I’m too fat. I’m ugly. I’m stupid. I’m not good enough. I’m a failure. I’m a loser. And on and on and on. I know most women think those things about themselves, too. It’s easy, right? There are so many messages out there telling us we aren’t good enough — not now, not ever. But I’m startled by how many smart, talented, funny, bright, loving, beautiful women I engage with readily put themselves down, out loud, often and regularly, especially in the presence of other women, and even in the workplace. One person says they’re fat, and suddenly everyone’s talking about how they’re fat. Insulting yourself is just so simple, and when those thoughts are bouncing around in your head, all the time, without fail, sometimes it’s all too easy to let them come spilling out. When one person starts, it’s effortless to just pile on with your own self-doubts, too. Suddenly it feels like we’re all bonding. “We all hate ourselves in these ways, but at least we’re not alone in hating ourselves.” But I really think it does more harm than good. Saying something negative [...]
↧